Tuesday, April 3, 2012

Struggles With An Aging Parent

My mom is in her early 80’s – and ironically, although I have downsized and made the move to a home that’s more conducive to my needs, she’s actually still living in the home where my sister and I grew up. While it’s not huge, I’m really beginning to see how its layout, structure and isolation are causing a lot of problems in her day to day.

First off, it’s an older home, where the hallways and doorways are narrow and where there’s no bedroom on the first floor – forcing her to use the stairs every morning when she wakes up and every night before she goes to bed. The cabinets are difficult for her to reach into, the washer and dryer are in the basement and as for the outside– well, it could definitely use a whole lot of TLC.

Due to increasing arthritis in her legs, she wakes up real stiff in the morning until she gets moving. Showering worries me after she slipped and fell a few years back, I’ve since come over every other night to assist her in getting in and out of the old tub, which requires her to lift a leg to get in.

I know that now is the time for her to make a move – into a place that that accommodates her aging needs. Ever since I, myself, moved into my retirement home in my 60’s, I’ve been insisting that she do the same before something forces her to make a move. Her biggest concern though? The expense of moving. She’s been to my very comfortable single family, single floor home – and after seeing how neat and new everything is, she’s automatically assumes that a place like that would cost a “pretty penny,” as she says.

What I’ve explained to her over and over again is that she can afford it – and I know that in the long run, she’ll be so much more content. Plus, she’d be right in the same neighborhood – and having her close would certainly give me the peace of mind that I need.

Hopefully soon I can make her see the light…

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